Thank You All
Feb 17th
I am a member of the Community of Christ. This denomination has churches around the
World. My congregation is in Midland,
MI. We have many in Michigan: over 90 & a few in Canada in our area. Our
Michigan President and their staff will organize classes or groups for
congregations, camps, or other groups. On Friday evening I went to Flint, Mi
for classes. Our group is called: S. A. L.T.
It means: Studies in Advanced
Leadership Training.
We got to the church, I signed in, found a place to sit,
class started and I sat and listened, once I did talk and most of the time I
was quiet. When I am in group it is hard
to hear what is being said, if I try to talk my brain will not go fast enough
to get a word out. And I can start to write
and I can’t go fast enough. So, I just
set down, put my hands down, listened and watch. I didn’t speak much. Went to the house, we ate and went to bed.
Feb 18th Saturday morning , I didn’t fell well. When we got to the church I didn’t tell anyone
that I was not well. Instead I would say
to the people: Hi, how are you, they
would say, I am ok or doing well and they would say to me: how are you. I said, doing all right. I lied. I walked away and looked for a place to be
alone as I started to cry. I found the
sanctuary and sat on a step under the picture of Jesus and cried with Him. Why am I crying? I want to be here. I want to go home. I
needed to go home. I did not know why or
how I was sick. I did not know why I was
crying and I just wanted to go home.
I was on my knees
asking God what was going on with me.
Was it my disease playing with my brain?
I did go home. During
the night I had a dream. It was really weird. It was filled with people in my
house, some out of the house, family, neighbors, dogs and friends. I was having
a great time. People were helping, some
were crying, some were funny and more. I
did not care that people thought I was crazy and some people said thank
you. It was fun. I was happy. I woke
up and realized that was a dream. Wow.
Went back to sleep and went right back in to the dream. When it was time to get up Butch woke me up
and asked me: were you talking to yourself or talking on your cell phone. I told him, I think I was talking out loud to
the people in my dream. So this morning
I was back on my knees, asking God: What
was that all about? So, I started to
think. And, I think I got it. It is more than being sick. On Saturday, we went to the church for the
class and I was talking back and forth to people: Hi, how are you, doing good, knowing that I am
not good.
Why: I had all the
books I needed for the class. I didn’t read them, could
not understand so many of words. When I want to talk I can’t get my brain to go
faster to get my words out of my mouth. It
was easier to not talk yet I wanted to share with the group.
Did I want to cry, did I want to go home. NO! I
want to be normal just as everyone else is.
On Monday, I stopped at the Alzheimer’s Association and I talked to Laura
about a program for Wednesday. Then I shared
with her what happened about my crying.
Told her I broke down, she asked me how I was feeling and I said: much
better. Then said: We call it a Break
Out. Meaning that you have been holding
back and it had to come out. I need to stand
up and to step up for People with Dementia and Alzheimer’s Disease. I am very happy when I am up and about.
I fill really good doing things in my life and I hope to
help others when I can. I want to go out to those that have Dementia. Now there are different types of Dementia, mine
is: Alzheimer’s Disease.
I know that God is always with us.
As long as we can walk, talk, love and pray to help to get through hard
times. Share our stories of our lives
now and in the past. Talk about family,
school, marriage, kids, work and loss in our lives. Get outside when you can. Walk, drive, call someone and ask if they
want to get out also and go to the show, groceries, church or get your hair
different or not. Look up, look
around. Read the newspapers, books,
magazine: food, TV, places out of town
or fly some where you want to go by yourself or take someone with you.
My thinking for now, when I cry I will let it out until it
stops, and then say: Thank You God,
where do you want me to go now.
Thank you all for your kindness, love and time, your hugs
and your prayers.
